empty..

i dunno wt happen actually..perhaps after done reading 2 novels..my mind was thinking about sm1..sm1 that hd changed my life a lot...erm...kinda shocked when there is a almost-same character in both novels who are almost-reflect sm1 that i really love..erm..

who is the person..sm of my fren know bout the person(easy to refer as A)..they said i was stupid to in love and believing the person(i agree so)..but yet..i still cant 4get or get angry to A(like sm other my frens did so)..erm..

why i cant 4get A..yup..A had messing up down my life twisting my day by 180 degree and make my world uncertainty but..behind that..A had gave a new life..A pulled me out fr the darkness..A proved me that world is not that bad..A gave me confidence to strive in trouble..A like everything 4 me...and ya..my frens said A jz want to have fun..is A thinking like that??

i was left without answer..no chance to meet A..technologies made us closer(still the invisible gap was so big)..ya..my soul is not happy wif that..i'm suffered but lucky the smile is still here...when the time comes..i was so down..alone..so lonely..i used to have A to help me...but...now..i'm alone looking 4 the light to bright my world..the rope to pull me out..erm...i live in my own imagination..

do i need to consult with sm1 who is expert..erm...A diff..even if A is a bad f^&*()_) ass&*!e..i dun mind as A gave me hope 2 survive..i learnt smthing as A always wants me to b happy and success...despite he had ruined(all of us including me agree) my life..looking at the bright side..without A..i still hiding behind..trapping in people judgments and definition..i b strong but when the time comes......................~~~